Hotness

I'll Get There too

2007-05-26T06:04:00.000-07:00

Ive been wanting to act and model since I was a little kid. I want to be an actress. I know Ill never be a model because I am too small for my age (hey, i am only 5") but im still hoping.My cousins and I used to imitate those people we see on tv and I used to play dress ups.Last night, I read an article in Teen Vogue about people who want to be famous. Jeniffer Hudson, for instance.She was eliminated in American Idol but that didn't stop her from doing what she wants. Now, she's an academy award winning actress and she's the cover of Vogue(I forgot what issue). Acting has been my passion since I dont know when. Acting is my only talent. I know I want to be an actress. I want to live a glamorous life. Ive never been on the spotlight. I joined a theatre guild in our school but Im not happy there because I dont have any close friends there. *im about to quit* but whatever. Acting will always remain as my passion. "Someday, I'll be BIG" I'll be glamorous someday.. SOON. Who knows, someday, I'll be an Oscar Winner. ;) and a supermodel. Or maybe I'll be a Tony award winning actress(though Im not gifted with a good singing voice) Haha :))

2007-04-24T05:19:00.000-07:00

NEWS FLASH: I am still alive.

Well, yes, barely. I'm gonna die!!! Because of the heat! Wait, no, scratch that. I'm gonna die because of boredom and heat. You know, basic math.

Boredom + Heat = Death

NOOOO! My mind is or should be in vacation now. But, how great, summer classes are just a week away. Preparation for college entrance tests my ass. These exams should occur next year when we are officially an incoming college students but no, they set it up before our last year from high school. I shouldn't be the one complaining, I guess, because ~~I'm cool like that~~ it's for convenient purposes. Oh well, what should happen will going to happen and I don't have anything against that.

If anyone's wondering, everything that's up there are for angst. Just wanna try it out. *wink, wink*

You gonna kill me now? ~~What'cha gonna do reader?~~

---

I made some poems. It's not that glamorous though. I'll post the latest. Here:

Between Bedcovers

Staring at the ceiling,
Bedridden,
Alone at last.

Watching the shadows,
Bedridden,
Dancing with vigor.

Taking shuddery breaths,
Bedridden,
Playing with fate.

Beneath the covers,
Bedridden,
Hoping for hope.

Turning to the windows,
Bedridden,
Waiting for you.

Gyarharhar. My creative juices has limits afterall.

---

I bring three icons. I made them. Please don't take the credit. Hope you like them! All falls under the theme of Summer.

:: ::

Sorry if they look a bit *cringe* novice to you. Ah well, that's my talent. But seriously, they need improvement man. [insert WIDE grin here]

---

That's all for today!

Love lots,
Jema

P.S. There, I made an update Is. Be proud!

P.P.S. Let's go out! Party!

Fashion Week

2007-04-02T08:25:00.000-07:00

Jema, Where are you? Haha. Long time no blog means RECAP!!

Thursday
Prom!! I had fun!! I arrived at Makati Shang-Rila at around 4.30 pm, but I didnt win the "early bird" award haha. I waited at the lobby and got bored so I went to Trizia's at room 630 to hangout. I saw Golda and Diane. Hehe. After that went to the lobby again and I saw Maui and DWAYNE. Haha. He is so cute/hot. hehe. Then I saw Maika,Abbie and Jema. haha. Blahblahblah. Jema and I waited for our dates. Haha. Basta we had fun. Okay?!

Friday,Saturday
okay. haha I forgot.

Sunday
Dessa and I went to the Phil. Fashion week which was held at Glorietta. We arrived there at around 5.30. We saw a lot of celebrities there. The designers were great btw. I love their designs. Haha. Then we got bored so Dessa and I window shopped. haha then had dinner at Mcdo and went to Starbucks. Sleepover at Dessa's crib was fun!! hehe.

Testing!!

2007-03-27T07:59:00.000-07:00

im a "newbie". haha . =))

Quotes

2007-03-27T07:57:00.000-07:00

was worried I wouldn't be good enough for you...
and that's why I lied. That's what scares me,
not being enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough,
not good enough.

I'm ready to be the girl I used to be.
The one who never cried,
never got mad about dumb things,
& the one girl who would never
worry about being in love.

I think it is time I let you go, and that is so hard to do /
because some part of me will be in love with you for the
rest of my life, but the ((daydreaming)),
the running in place.....it's not healthy. So this is me,
cutting the cord. This is me, doing what I should have
done eight months ago.....saying goodbye. <|3

I'm letting go of the past and moving on.
I realized what I have isn't that bad,
and I'm done worrying about what's gone.

It's time to let you go. It's time to say goodbye. No more excuses, no
more tears to cry. There's been so many changes. I've been so confused.
All along you were the one. All the time I never knew. I want you to be
happy. You're my best friend. But, it's so hard to let you go now, with all
that could have been. I'll always have the memories. She'll always have you.

Because these are my last words.
And this my last breath. I'd give you
everything if there was something left.
I have nothing left to prove,
and I will live with my regrets.
I would give you everything,
if only there was something left.

Yes, you can try to get over him
wash him away with your tears
but every girl knows that in the
bottom of your heart, even if it`s
only a tiny part, he is always ;
going to be part of your l i f e

I miss the days you held me, and the days I heard your voice.
I miss the days you were there. Us falling apart wasn't my
choice. I miss the days you kissed me, and the feelings
we used to show. But most of all, I miss the guy that
I thought I used to know.

I've never understood the reasoning for someone to "move on" from a relationship. It's not like you are really going to "move on", you are just trying to tell your heart to stop thinking about that person every second of every minute of everyday until it finally becomes a routine and you don't notice it anymore. That is, until you see that person again, with someone who isn't you, and then you have to remind yourself again

So maybe I was wrong in thinking we were meant to be & that we were made for each other. Maybe we were never supposed to fall in love the way we did. Hell, we probably weren't even supposed to meet when we did, or maybe we shouldn't have met at all. But I know this much, if we aren't meant to be I don't know why I can't seem to come to terms of saying goodbye to you. And if we weren'tfall in love then it was the most beautiful mistake I’ve ever made. And if I hadn't have met you, I probably wouldn't be the person I am today. I loved you with everything I had in me.

It may seem like the wrong thing to do,
but you have to forget about the guy
who f o r g o t about you

At some point you have to realize that he doesn't care,
and you could be missing out on someone who actually does.

Sometimes a person has to let go
because their heart is just too tired
of holding on. They'll always love
you though. No matter what.

Sometimes the hardest thing to let go of is
something you never really had. What could've
happened didn't. It’s just the way the cookie
crumbles. This is my goodbye to you.
I’ll never forget the way you made me smile.

Well, I finally let him go. The guy who treated me awful and now, finally
he realizes what he threw away. But, this time, I finally have the courage
to stay away from him and just be myself. I finally have the courage to say,
I'm not coming back, you realized too late..

Fuck you for leading me on
Fuck you for making me fall for you
Fuck you for being perfect in my eyes
Fuck you for knowing what to say, everytime.
Fuck you for trying to spend time with me.
Fuck you for making me want you
Fuck you for letting me go,
when you knew I wanted to stay.

I spent so many nights thinking about you
my heart spent to many hours missing you
I wasted my time being with you
and now it's time to move on.

Don't call me, don't write, and don't show up late at night.
You know we needed some time and space. So now I say
the things I want to say. Sometimes it’s better letting go this
way. I'll always know deep in my soul that we really had
so far to go. I've given all I've had to give and now it’s time
for me to live. And I won't look back and I won't regret,
although it hurts like hell. Someday I will forget you...

And I aint lookin back
I'm giving up on loving you,
I can't take the pain you've put me through.
Deep down I know the feelings will always be there...
Maybe someday you'll actually care.

Don't ever try to come back to me
Because this time I'm moving on
And you're nothing but a [[memory]]

Prom cramming

2007-03-27T07:16:00.000-07:00

Im bored and lazy.

Recap!!
Yesterday

went to Cheskie's house
went to Pergula (ayala heights): Farewell party
adventures of the Green Queens
Farewell party was fun
Swimming party. I didnt swim. hehe
Beer!! hehe a little tipsy
I'll miss PauPau, Abby,Maya,Jow and Jussell.

Today

went to Kamae's house
went to Issa's house to get my videocam
went to SM north
bought shoes,clutch,accessories
didnt buy Sally Hansen airbrush
I saw Karen B. !:

** sorry. Im lazy**
Here's to all the girls who used to be his number one. The ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning & be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, & moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, "I only want to be your friend", one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves & misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute. Here's to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. We listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, & even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, & ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to settle for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated. Here's for the ones who did their hair and make up & put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls who loved him more than words can say, & took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn't bear to look back on their lives one day & wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, & cried during the entire conversation. The ones who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with. This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, & get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that "things were going too fast, he needs time." Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an "I told you so." The ones that could just tell that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts & their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time, that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that finally realized that he never gave a crap about them. Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, & the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here's for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better. This is for those confusing days, when you miss him & want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong and remember that relationships are like broken glass; sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together & get hurt. Remember the times you cried & how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When 'your song' comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made & tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation & the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night & how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to. One day you'll find a guy who's worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry. You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's going to hurt like crap, & it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls who fell back in love with their ex, only to get hurt all over again.

K. Bye

XOXO,
Issa <3

2007-03-25T22:16:00.000-07:00

I'm bored. And it's super hot.

---

Well, Issa and I decided to make this blog run for years. Though I have a short attention span on things, I cross my fingers and hope.

---

Argh. Inconsistency! Whatever.

---

Love lots,

Jema

2007-03-25T01:56:00.000-07:00

I finally saw our shared blog. :D

Hmm, So what can I say? Introduce myself first, I guess. I'm the co-owner, Jema, and I didn't contribute anything to the making of this blog. :D It was all Issa's hard work. Hehe.

Anyway, it's so hot right now and boring.

So I'll have my own share of recap:

Friday

So damn frustrating. I went to school hoping that I could settle everything immediately to be cleared so I can go home early. I did. But noo, stupid freaking guard won't let us out till 12. How's that? Also, I was hoping to buy an invitation for my promdate because I wasn't able to pay on the duedate. Hehe. Stupid me. :p I was lucky Tracy ~~was it?~~ was still selling those invis. So anyway, gate opened and students ~~including me of course~~ jumped(not literally, mind you) for joy. I was out in an instant. T-Ann and Issa went with me and I dropped them at Mcdo or Starbucks. Wherever. *See Issa's post below to see more info* Everything went fine, I think, and that's that. :D

Saturday

First day of Summer! Yeah! It's hot though. Today was the scheduled flight of my Tita Irene and Tito Henry back to the other country to work. Everyone's crying except me and my cousin. I dunno why they're crying though. It's not like they're not coming back. Right? So yeah. Alex, daughter of my Tito, was crying hard. She was a Dady's girl. So to make her stop crying we conceded to watch a Barbie movie. Ugh, childish but sure, I'll watch it to just make her stop wailing.

I ate lots of ice cream. <3

---

Recap done but I have more worries.

I need to buy/know the following things for Prom:
>>Clutch Bag
>>Shawl
>>Accessories
>>Shoes
>>Name of my date
>>Time of my rendezvous with Finzy

Hah, no emergencies or anything like that. :D

--

When you are a teenage girl ...

-- you're friends are more important than your family.
-- boyfriends are a major priority.
-- you have to look perfect even if you're going somewhere stupid just incase you see someone you know.
-- you sneak out to meet a friend or a guy.
-- you become irritated by little things.
-- you whine about guys to everyone.
-- you're embarrassed to go to the mall with your parents.
-- you know what your 'bases' are & you have been to some.
-- you need new clothes all the time.
-- you go to parties every weekend, unless your parents come up with a stupid excuse for you not to go.
-- you go 'for walks' just to find guys.
-- you go into town not to shop but just to have somewhere to 'hangout' with your friends and look cool.
-- you know the real reason for make-up counters in department stores.
--you have endless sleepovers with your mates but your not exactly sure why they are called 'sleepovers' because you don't remember sleeping.
-- you still secretly love to spend saturday morning in front of the television watching disney films you should have chucked years ago.
-- you know why a crush is called a 'crush'.
-- you spend allthe time wishing you were older but at the same time wish you were three again.
-- you know the meaning of heart broken
-- you hate school (but at the same time love it)
-- you know that in the end friends should always come before dates
-- you know to take too many pictures, laugh until you wet yourself and enjoy every day like it could be your last because one day it will be your last.

---

Whew. That was long... Anyway, see you again!

News flash: When a girl says she's cold, you're not supposed to say, " Me too."

2007-03-25T01:03:00.000-07:00

I am so bored na. Summer na nga. Super Hot... ko. hehe:))

Recap:

Friday
clearance day. pft. soooooo boring. Nagstay kami dun nila Maui,Jema,T-ann,Kamae and lahat hanggang 12. wala talagang kwenta. Then after that, T-ann and I went to LSC and we saw Jana, Alex,Jamoi and ??? (i forgot the other one) hehe. Anyway, after that T-ann went home and I went to mcdo and saw Abbie and Joana, I sit with them, then went to Drew's, nagcomputer lang kami. Then I went to National and saw a lot of MC students there. Dessa fetched me there and we went to the clinic. Nagpaderma kami: Ioton and Diamond Peel. My face hurts. :( Then Dessa, me and her relatives went to Marikina Riverbanks because gusto nila makita yung biggest shoe. Nilibre nila ako ng dinner sa Chowking. Thanks talaga.

Saturday
My first day of S-U-M-M-E-R. Super boring. Kain lang ako ng kain. Haha. PG. :/ . I watched Princess Hours sa youtube. I super love Princess Hours. <3. Shin (Gian) is so HOT. Troy is also Hot. I love them both. My favorite episodes are episode 23 and 24. You must watch.

I am not Anorexic
I think I am getting fat. Oh no. My tummy is getting bigger. :( I mean, im thin but my tummy is big. And I am not anorexic. I am aware that I am thin. Ayoko lang lumaki tummy ko tapos ang payat payat ko pa.

Prom
Prom's 4 days away. Here's a list that I must buy and need for prom:

Shoes
Clutch/Bag
Sally Hansen airbrush>>for my uneven skintone
Jewelries
I need to go to the dentist
I need to go to Kamae's house>> for the jewelry stuff
Hair and make-up

Effects of Boredom :/
List of things that I want to buy(I am a Material Girl )

iMac or apple laptop
Digital Camera
iPhone
PSP
portable dvd player
puppy!!
a new cellphone
a D&G cellphone
lots of designer clothes and designer bags/jewelries/accessories
a closet full of designer clothes and stuffs
a make-up set/box
lots of jewelries
own condo
camera na pang photographer
etc...

Before I die I want...

a Broadway debut
to be a Broadway actress
to be a Hollywood actress
to win an Oscar/Golden Globe/SAG/Bafta etc.
to win a Tony
to study anywhere in Europe or...
to study anywhere in California or New York>> UCLA, USC,NYU etc. or..
to study in Switzerland
my own clothing line
to be a fashion designer
to own mansions
to be a photographer
to travel and see the whole world
to live and own a mansion in Beverly Hills and anywhere in Europe
to learn how to speak French, Italian, Latin
to own a hospital
to be a doctor
to discover/invent something
to own a mall
to own a big company
to be the richest woman
write a book
write a play
direct a movie/tv
to be a super model
to marry my true love
to be a princess
to learn how to use Adobe photoshop
to marry a prince
2 kids
a happy family
to be rich and famous
to be remembered
a reunion with my friends>> kapag tumanda na kami
to be successful
to own a magazine company
to be more closer to God
to be HAPPY
a good relationship with my loved ones
my family and friends to be happy too.
my family and friends to be successful too
to make a difference

and the list goes on....

Storm and clouds may gather and stars may collide. But I love you until the end of time

XOXO
Issa

She's the one

2007-03-24T08:54:00.000-07:00

From Dessa's blog

She's the one you call when you're bored because she makes you laugh. She's the one you talk to when you're feeling down because she's willing to lend an ear & be a friend. She's not the one you call when you need a date to your company's Christmas party, or to go dancing with on a Saturday night. She's the one you spend time with between girlfriends, before you find "The One." You know, the one who you keep around in the meantime. She's not one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you don't look at her as a 'real' woman, either. She's not bitchy enough, or moody enough to be seen in that light. She's too laid-back, too easily amused by the same things your male buddies are amused by. She's too understanding, too comfortable; she doesn't make you feel nervous or excited the way a 'real' woman does. But she's cool, and nice, and funny, & attractive enough that when you're lonely & need female companionship, she'll do just fine. You don't have to wine & dine her because she knows the real you already, & you don't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve. You're not trying to get anything of substance out of her, she's not easy, but you know that she cares about you & is attracted to you, & that she'll give you the friend you need. And you know you don't have to explain yourself or the situation, that she'll be able to cope with the fact that this isn't the beginning of a relationship or that there's any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her. It won't bother her that you'll go on a date with the woman you've been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you. She'll settle for a goodbye hug & a promise to call her & tell her how the date went. She's just so cool.

But deep down, if you really think about it (which you probably don't because to you, the situation between the two of you isn't important enough to merit any real thought), you know that it's really not fair. You know that although she would never say it, it hurts her to know that despite all her good points & all the fun you two have, you don't think she's good enough to spend any real time with. Sure, it's mostly her fault, because she doesn't have to give in to your needs. She could play the hard-to-get person like the rest of them do, if she really wanted to. But you & she both know that she probably couldn't pull it off. Maybe she's too short, or a little overweight, or has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Taco Bell. Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman. So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, & you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow be everything you ever wanted in a woman. You'll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, & she'll laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental tux. She doesn't captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile. Mainly she blends in with the crowd. She's safe. She doesn't want to be the center of attention & turn the heads of everyone in the room, but she wants to turn someone's head. She wants to be special to someone, too. We all do. She has feelings; she has a heart. In fact, she probably has a bigger & better heart than any woman you've ever known because she's had a front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, & she likes you anyway. She obviously sees something worthwhile & redeeming in you because although you've given her nothing, absolutely no reason to still be around, she is. And someday, she won't be around.

Joint Blog

2007-03-24T08:30:00.000-07:00

Hey. This is Issa. The co-owner of this blog. Hehe. Im currently watching Princess Hours so Im kinda busy right now.

Ciao. <3